DOES THIS MAKE MY BUTT LOOK BIG?

I just love all the really fun boots that are out there this winter. I used some Christmas money to buy a super cute pair of champagne colored mid-calf boots with big laces up the front & a zipper on the side you don’t have to tie them every time.

Being somewhat older than the average female fashionista, I have had some difficulty finding pants that will fit smoothly in the boots without bunching making it look like I’m wearing a pair of fatigues & combat boots. The tights that many young women wear look great if you weigh 85 pounds & don’t jiggle. Not me for sure!

Having reached the age of 60-something, I just will not wear something that is totally uncomfortable anymore no matter how great it looks. That pretty much eliminates the skin tight, & I do mean SKIN tight, jeans that many women wear now days. I’ve seen plenty of women with their “muffin tops” exposed & their jeans so snug that you can see pretty much every nook & cranny of the feminine anatomy.

Whatever happened to stirrup pants? I know they went out of style sometime in the 80s – or was it even earlier? But they were wonderful to wear with boots. Maybe they will make a comeback.

Currently, there is a clothing item on the market known as “jeggings” – a cross between leggings & jeans. Well, I bought a pair the other day that are really stretchy & look like jeans except that they are basically skin tight but remarkably comfortable. Fortunately, they have some substance to hold in most parts without cutting off your circulation.

I put them on this morning with my super cute boots for a lunch date with a friend. I tried looking at myself in the mirror from every angle to make sure things weren’t bulging out somewhere that they shouldn’t be. Finally I went downstairs to get Lou’s opinion.

We have discussed the age old question, “Honey, does this make my butt look big?” a couple times. I’ve told him I will never ask him that particular question because we both know that there is only one right answer, “No, of course not”. And besides, if I’m being honest, I know when something makes me look fat. Here is the conversation:

Me: Okay, I want your honest opinion. I promise I won’t get upset or angry but I need to know if these jeggings make me look too fat or to bulgy or like an old lady wearing something inappropriate.

Lou (in a pleading voice):  You are not supposed to ask that question.

Me:  I’m not asking if my butt looks big. I’m asking if anything is bulging or rolling or if it is just too much.

Lou (after looking me over):  No, it looks good, very stylish.

Me:  Are you sure? If you saw me walking down the street, would you think, ‘Look at that old woman trying to look like a teen-ager’?

Lou:  No, you look fine. Very nice.  And no camel toe (he added a few seconds later with a smile).

Me:  Okay, thanks Sweetie, that’s good to know.

I’m sure I heard him breathe a sigh of relief as I left the room to finish getting ready for my lunch.  My friend, Judi, confirmed that I did indeed look just fine & she added that she has seen far, far worse. I know what she means. I recall a middle-aged woman in the Paris airport a few years back who would have made a plumber blush when she bent down to get something out of her bag. Yikes!

I’ve always been a bit of a rebel & love to push the envelope a bit when it comes to fashion choices but I really don’t want to offend anyone’s sensitivities. I just want my pants to stay tucked in my boots. Is that too much to ask?