It has me feeling
introspective & reflective on this life that I've lived as I get ready to
start my eighth decade on this planet. Once again I have to repeat that -
eighth decade! What the fuck? There is no other way I can convey my opinion on
that fact. As an aside it should be noted that neither my father or mother ever
swore around the house when we were kids, barely a hell or damn. BUT both my sister
& I can rival most longshoreman when it comes to "speaking
French". When some old man says "pardon my French", I always
reply, "No problem, I speak French fluently." It has always come
naturally to me & sure gets a hell of a lot of frustration out.
I taught my son from the
time he was a child that it's okay to swear as long as it is warranted &
you don't do it around people who are offended. He & I have quite colorful
conversations when things just need to be expressed. So, my conclusion is that
swearing as an adult has nothing to do with your upbringing. My parents never
swore around me & I swear. We always swore around Darrin & he swears.
But I digress.....back to my thoughts on
turning 70 & all those years past.
What I learned......
In my 20s: I don't think most of us learn a lot in our 20s. We
are too busy trying to figure out who we are especially if you get married at
19 before you have a chance to grow up. But the BEST thing that ever happened
to me was in my 20s. At age 26 I gave birth to my only child, Darrin Allen
Silver. It was the single biggest event in my life. I learned that I was not
the most important person in my universe.
In my 30s: I discovered that being a full time mom was the great
passion of my life. I loved every minute of being a mom & threw myself into
that endeavor one hundred percent. Unfortunately, having my mother for a role
model taught me only what NOT to do when raising my son. However, I trusted
myself & carved out my own nonconventional way of doing things. But that's
a whole other blog post. I am extremely proud of the person I raised &
pretty damn proud of myself for doing it all my way, just like Frankie sang.
In my 40s: I came to the realization that although I loved
devoting my life to Darrin & my husband & wouldn't change a single
thing, I had no idea who Kathy was as a woman. What did I like? What things did I
want to do? Everything had revolved around my son & my husband. I liked
what they liked. I did what they did. Who was I? In that decade between ages 30 & 40 I lost all four of my
grandparents & my mother which had a profound effect on me. My son was fast
approaching adulthood & it was time to figure out who the fuck Kathy was.
In my 50s: In my early 50s I did just that. I was now divorced
from a good husband who just wasn't the right one for me. I discovered that I
enjoyed my own company. I also discovered a new love with a man who shared my
desire to travel & photograph the world. We had the means to explore the
world & have done just that for the past 18 years. Neither of us has any
desire to get married. Being a product of the 1960s, it may be a bit of the
rebel in me who relishes "living in sin". But mostly it just seems
that we like being together because we choose to be, not because we are bound
by a contract. I realized that my soul connections - soul mate, soul relatives,
soul friends - are what give my life meaning, my life blood.
In my 60s: The most amazing thing happened to me! I became a
grandmother (AKA Gaga) to Charley Ellen Silver. From the moment I gazed into
those piercing blue eyes as she grabbed onto my finger when she was only a
couple hours old, I fell into the purest love I've ever known. There is indeed something
magical about being a grandma. My Charley made my life complete.
Lou & I are continuing
our travel or trying to anyway. We should be recovering from jet lag after our
trip to Italy
No comments:
Post a Comment